things i'd like to have done by the time i hit the big 3-oh.

1. finish school!
2. quit smoking.
3. travel.
4. learn to speak bahasa indonesia properly and kampampangan (did i spell that right?)
5. move the fuck outta here. (soo tired of living with the parental units)
6. drop 20 pounds.
7. get a job. (i realize i need this for most of my goals)
8. get my 350z
9. save money so i can pay for sister's college education.
10. get rid of my social anxiety.

that gives me five years to complete this list. i hope i can do it.

i woke up only thirty minutes ago but i still feel exhausted. i stayed up all night and morning finishing up my three papers. i was lucky that my music teacher gave us an extra 9 hours to turn papers in because otherwise, i'd never been able to do it. so yay, two of my classes or over with it. now all i have to do is wait for grades and deal with philosophy. =/

it's too fucking hot. it's noon and it's already 96°. it's supposed to reach 111° =( omg, i'm going to die. i wish i had a swimming pool or a/c that would actually cool down my room.

so today i'm too tired to call up toyota about my window. i don't feel like dealing with shit today. i'll try to clean the house and i'll visit the boyfriend tonight. cool.

i am such a procrastinator. my art and music online classes end tomorrow. art: i have a final paper to type. i think it has to be 5 pages long. music: composer report 3-5 pages; concert review paper 3-5 pages; exam 2. i haven't started any of that. i have a long day tomorrow. at least i got my philosopy quiz out of the way. i got 11/15. that's not good. i started out thinking that philosophy would be my favorite class... fuck that shit. i like philosophy while talking among brothers and friends... i hate philosophy as a class. it's bullshit. ugh.

bf update: he actually came back on i think the 29th of june. so he's been here for awhile. it was really weird at first. i don't know why. i mean, i felt weird too but after awhile i felt like it was like he never left... but he continued to act all weird and stuff so i don't know.

the other day he told me a secret. it's something he didn't even tell his friends. it took him so long to even tell me. at first i was like... oh cool. whatever. but today... i don't know what i feel. i feel kind of insecure. i feel REALLY insecure.

lately i've been wondering what he's even doing with me cuz i don't think i'm like any of his exes. it's weird. i'm confused.

oh yeah, and i read my paper journal (that's all about him and us) outloud to him. he said it didn't bother him but i think it did. why did i do that? i claim temporary insanity. it was 3am.

i wish i bought a different car. or at least got it with stock tires. i think performance tires are a pain in the ass. especially since i don't even have a performance car. whythefuck do i have those stupid tires. it wouldn't be so bad if i could spraypaint my rims black. that would be nice. too bad i have lazyass brothers that wouldn't help me. one of my brothers is soo lazy... he spraypainted 3 of his rims black. the fourth, he just left it white cuz he was too LAZY to finish the job. oh yeah.

pretty random stuff.